"Just do it" - Nike

Another one of those chicken & egg questions: Did Nike motivate its star golfer to “just do it” with the ladies or did the star golfer's “just do it” attitude got him the Nike sponsorship?

If Nike is to sponsor me with yoga gear & a world tour, I will have plenty to blog about. Hence, currently not doing it.

A tale

Once upon a time, there lived a girl (a normal happy girl - not a princess) named Tinkerbell. Tinkerbell (named after a character in the tale of Peter Pan) enjoyed laughing, singing, dancing and having tea with her friends - Fairy Funshine, Fairy TenderHeart, and Fairy Queen Mother. Tinkerbell was inspired by music and arts and was curious about philosophy, numerology, cosmology, and anything that her spirit was drawn to. Tinkerbell's kind & sweet friends were special because they encouraged satya (truth) in self. In the company of her fairy friends, Tinkerbell was truly free to be just the way she was.

Tinkerbell worked hard growing fruits, vegetables, and tea leaves in her garden. One day, out of sheer curiousity, Tinkerbell decided to go into the city. Naively, Tinkerbell brought her tea leaves with her in hopes of having tea with new company. Entering the city, Tinkerbell sensed darkness, sadness, and an air of evil. She noticed a large group of hetero men fishing for nymphs in the swamp. Tinkerbell cautiously approached these men and was instantly shunned. These men gave Tinkerbell the look of disgust. As an offering of friendship and peace, Tinkerbell offered them the tea leaves from her garden. These men took the tea leaves and proceeded to roll them up and smoked them. "Wait - you are supposed to steep them in hot water to make tea; they are not for smoking" said Tinkerbell. Tinkerbell tried to warn them that smoking these tea leaves could damage their physical bodies. Needless to say, these men ignored Tinkerbell's warning. After much smoking, these men continued their fishing activities - but lo & behold one by one they started to experience erectile disfunction.

Before Tinkerbell could leave for the safety of her home, these men started to yell at Tinkerbell and pelted Tinkerbell with stones and sticks. Tinkerbell tried running away but one of the men managed to capture Tinkerbell. Tinkerbell was tied to an old oak tree. These men continuously yelled out insults at Tinkerbell - calling her everything from ugly to a freak with wild crazy hair and a big butt. Tinkerbell was scared and sad - the light of her spirit slowly flickering away to the point that physical pain no longer mattered.

In times of trouble, the only way Tinkerbell knew how to cope was to hold on to her faith in the grace of the universe. As she was exhaling, Tinkerbell heard a soothing lullaby from afar and started to feel sweet warmth against her skin. Slowly she opened her eyes and smiled widely as she saw Tantra Guru glowing in front of her. "Don't worry Tinkerbell. I will make things right" said Tantra Guru to comfort Tinkerbell. [Note to readers - Tantra Guru was a guru of Tantra Philosophy which is not the same as Tantric Sex]

All the hetero men awoke to the bright glow of Tantra Guru. "Dear friends, I am here to humbly ask for you to free my student, Tinkerbell. Please open your heart to love and compassion. Exhale and let yourself be sensitive - perhaps with softness in your eyes, you will see beauty and goodness in everything around you, including those who are slightly different than the typical. Live kindly and let yourself love and be loved. Let beauty inspire you to show love and compassion to all beings". Hypnotized by the magical energy of Tantra Guru, the hetero men untied Tinkerbell from the tree and set her free. The hetero men started to sing and dance to a merry tune. They even complimented the women in the city of their beauty. The women in turn complimented the hetero men of their strength and intelligence. Even women who once pretended to be swamp nymphs to attract the hetero men started to embrace their true selves. The hetero men's previous disfunctions started to function again. Happiness was spiralling upwards.

Tinkerbell with the company of Tantra Guru started their journey home. Before Tantra Guru and Tinkerbell parted ways, Tinkerbell thanked Tantra Guru and vowed to continue to flow with grace and to have faith in the universe.

At home, Tinkerbell's sweet fairy friends nurtured her spirit and physical health back to her happy self again.

THE END.

Nummy Yummy

"A synergy of taste & quality from across the globe - every hour... every day... " - a motto for a local restaurant which somehow makes me think of how sweet it will be if referred to men.

An asexual micro-orgasm

The hetero male population in this 2010 Winter Olympic host city (where I live) has a special talent in leading a rather girlish girl (full of Shakti power) into feeling like a mere asexual micro-orgasm. Organic cleansing or intolerable cruelty? Lately, it's been an inclination to tbe latter. Yes, yes - time to plan a get away so that I can feel like a woman again or risksdissolving from an asexual micro-orgasm into a speckle of dirt.

No firearms allowed

Upon entering Bumbershoot music festival grounds this past weekend, I noticed the following sign: "No firearms allowed at events". I did think to myself - was this sign really necessary?

While waiting for Jason Mraz to step on stage, I overheard an interesting conversation between two guys and a girl. In attempts to impress the girl, one of the guys said to the girl "I used to be in the Marine - they really train you to kill. Till now, I still have the itch to kill".

THAT was why the no firearms sign was necessary at public events.

Dear Judd Apatow

Dear Judd Apatow

As entertaining as your movies are - I do wish to express my concern on the effects your movies have on dating for girls like me. Your movies which usually feature the average guy hooking up with the hot girl has made it more so challenging for average girls to meet guys (any guy). Well, you see, your movies have led the average guys to believe that only very hot girls are deserving of them - which leads to no men for the average girls. So, we, the average girls, are not only shut out from the hot guys but also the average guys now.

My plea to you Mr. Apatow - could you make movies about the average smart & funny girl ending up happily ever after with the hot, smart & funny guy? If that's beyond your capability or if that somehow breaks the mancode that you may have with the brotherhood, could you please convince the very talented Tina Fey to take on such challenge?

Yours truly,
Smart & Funny Girl

Do you find love or does love find you?

In this business of finding love, efforts certainly do not translate into results. There is absolutely no correlation, whatsoever - which leads me to think perhaps one can't find love but love would have to find its way into one's life. Love - by which I mean romantic love - is like family and friends - they just somehow happen; we certainly did not seek out family nor friends. These gifts are somehow blessed upon us naturally and organically.

Of course there is the camp which purports finding love is akin to finding a job. But getting a job translates into having to work. The last time I checked, there is still a negative connotation attached to "work".

In the business of finding love, I am just going to sit back and let love find its way to me. My part in this is to do everything that I enjoy doing and cracking open my heart. When love arrives, my heart will be open to let it in. Deal, Universe?

Oh, Lenny...

As I was listening to the Best of Lenny Kravitz last Sunday, this song spoke to me & finally inspired me to clean my apartment.

Heaven Help

There comes a time
To be free of the heart
I wanna be ready
Ready to start
On a love journey
Got places to go
Made up my mind
And I have got to let you know

Heaven help the heart
That lets me inside
Heaven help the one
Who comes in my life
Heaven help the fool
That walks through my door
cause I decided right now
Im ready for love

A funny feelings coming
Over me
Now Im inspired and open to being
In a love place
But its out of my hands
Im telling you baby that you got to understand

Heaven help the heart
That lets me inside
Heaven help the one
Who comes in my life
Heaven help the fool
That walks though my door
cause I decided right now
Im ready for love
Ready for love

I can't see whats out there for me
And I know love offers no guarantee
Ill take a chance and im
Telling you something babe
I got to let you know

Heaven help the heart
That lets me inside
Heaven help the one
Who comes in my life
Heaven help the fool
That walks through my door
cause I decided right now
Im ready for love

Ready for love
Take a chance
Take the chance on love
The heart, the fool

Summer solstice

This morning of the summer solstice I dozed off into a delightful lucid dreamland. I was flying in the cool blue sky and was greeted by beautiful heart-shaped clouds and a rainbow. I was happy and free. I was liberated by the wrath of looking for romance - it was a sign from the universe to set me free. I will struggle no more and surrender to the liberation that welcomes me. Total freedom to explore - to be the ultimate wanderlust.

Unskilled

Hooking a guy takes more skills than beauty & that particular skill sets, I seriously lack. Is it too late to start learning? I certainly hope not. Any love guru out there who would be so kind to share your knowledge & most importantly your expertise in this area? I need help!!!!

Ice lolly

I could seriously use an ice lolly or two in this scorching heat. I could in particular use the ice lolly that is inspired by Daniel Craig 007 out of the water shot. Yes, Del Monte is selling the special "license to chill" lolly - however, sadly only available in UK.

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/newstopics/celebritynews/5416143/Daniel-Craig-in-007-lolly.html

Sisterhood Unite!

To my dear little sisters:

I must share with you my experience with naysayers. Time over time, you ,as a female, will encounter many naysayers who convey to you negative messages such as you are not beautiful, you are not smart enough or too smart, you are weak, etc.

I was recently told that boys do not like girls who are funny and intelligent - unless you are hot. (Yes, I gasped when I heard such comment being verbalised - shocking). I cannot believe female oppression being so prevalent even today - "modern" times.

My dear little sisters - be as smart and as funny as you are - embrace all that God has given you. You are a creation of God and therefore you are always a beautiful being. By saying otherwise, the naysayers may have just spat in the face of God by negatively criticizing God's creation.

Do not fear success and self-sufficiency - by being able to take care of yourself, you essentially give yourself freedom to be curious, freedom to learn, freedom to explore, and most importantly freedom to love.

You are all beautiful in the eyes of the enlightened ones.

Om namah shiva ya

p.s. If someone tells you that you are not hot, just tell them that you are more so an editorial beauty over a commercial one - something useful I picked up from watching way too many hours of Top Model.

Reckless Abandon

'Tis graduation season for young adults - everytime I walked pass the local theatre, there seemed to be a graduation ceremony. Ah - those young faces, full of exuberance and excitement for the future. Youth reminds me of the reckless abandon ways to life - especially with respect to love. When did I start losing that reckless abandon ways? Like the Pepsi commercial, I wish to regain my reckless abandon to love. Rock on.

Blind optimism or an audacity to hope?

Often when asked what I want in the man (who I seeketh as a partner in life) - I answered "someone like Barack Obama". The usual responses range from "be real - that's not possible" to that beyond words but mere laughter.

I am not dreaming about making my life with a president (in fact, I rather not). It is not the power behind the man that I admire - but the many qualities of Mr. Obama (that are apparent to the public) that I am in awe of. I am taken by his quiet strength, the way he listens before he speaks, the humility he's unafraid to display with his self-deprecating humour, his intelligence, his "audacity to hope", his belief in the goodness in humanity, and most importantly the way he conducts himself with grace.

I need a man with such awe-inspiring qualities who will catch me before I slip into the path of Plath. In turn, I offer my utter devotion, respect, love, support and acts (which no words will do justice of - or simply the "catch-all" category).

Dear readers - if you wish to play matchmaker, send to me guys with such admirable qualities.

Pavlov's Dog - Classical conditioning

Love takes flight

Air New Zealand just announced its inaugural "matchmaking" flight set to depart Los Angeles for Auckland on October 13. The experience will include a pre-flight gate party, themed food, drink, games and entertainment. Passengers can upload their dating profile six months before the flight to scope out the other singles. What a fantastic idea? I think my travel plan for the fall is set.

http://www.thematchmakingflight.com/

Kiss Goodbye

I had drinks with my friend, LoveSickBoy, over the weekend who was clearly heart-broken. He recently parted with his love interest who had to return to her home country across the ocean. Before her departure, LSB surprised her by renting out the music studio with a grand piano at the local music school so that he can sing her a Chinese song titled "Kiss Goodbye" - very very sappy Chinese song. LSB who had not touched the piano in years rehearsed for a few weeks before he performed the song for his special girl.

I thought that was quite the romantic gesture (since I brought out my air violin and played it while he told me the tale and also again when he retold the tales to my other girlies). What was the most romantic gesture that someone had ever done for you?

State of Consciousness

There are three states of consciousness: awaken, dreamy, and unconscious. I often choose to stay in the dreamy and unconscious states where I hang out with the likes of Lenny Kravitz & Jamie Foxx meanwhile in my awaken state I have to be in the company of Socially Awkward Guy or the Disinterested Guy - which do you think is more sufferable?

Dharma

Very sad to share the news of the passing of great yoga guru - Sri K Pattabhi Jois. He who popularized asthanga yoga in the Western world and also taught many others who in turn spread the goodness of yoga to all.

The guru may have left the mortal world but he left us with the legacy of the goodness of yoga teachings.

Om shanti shanti

What is Love?

Hmm....that I don't know. All I know is the Universe isn't showing me much of that these days. Sigh.

Accessorize

Have you ever notice a guy's accessory? I, who usually am too distracted by a witty conversation or fine abs, to notice the kind of watch a guy wears was brought to attention of the case of digital watch by a buddy. According to my buddy, a grown adult male who wears a digital watch at a social function often falls under the category of unchic geek. Agree or disagree?

Hmm...I wonder what guys think of a girl who wears studded cuff along with a strand of opera length pearls...

Say what?

Last Friday, I headed to a charity function at a local pub/club with the usual fab girls after our happy hour drinks. There we met a few new faces - friends of friend. One of the new faces, let's call him Socially Awkward Guy (that is the nicest moniker I can come up with and you will soon realize why I said "nicest"), came up to me and started a conversation which went down like this:

SAG: Hi - you look familiar to me.
BB: Oh, really? Maybe we went to the same school - which program did you do?
SAG: No, you were in my dreams [Such cheesiness should have been my cue to exit conversation but I continued to be nice]
BB: So, what do you do besides hanging out at clubs & dreaming about me?
SAG: I play with myself [That was the exact phrase he uttered - I was certainly shocked by this point]
BB: Hmm....maybe you shouldn't tell strangers that you play with yourself, especially girls.
SAG: What's wrong with that? Everyone plays with him or herself. I'm not good with girls.
BB: Umm...maybe you're not good with girls because you spend all your time playing with yourself.

I had enough of this conversation and turned to the fab girls and retold them the convo that I just had with SAG. They were as shocked as I was. For the rest of the evening, I avoided SAG.

As the girls and I were dancing and having fun, I felt someone grabbed me from behind - and it was the disgusting SAG. EWW!!!!!!! The girls, as reliable as always, came to my rescue & immediately built a wall to protect me against SAG. I was kept safely away from any further grabby hands or rude conversation from SAG.

I think I may have hit the lowest low in terms of my social interaction with the men in my cities.

Someone to watch over me

Next time I am asked the question what I seek in a guy - I shall sing to them this lovely Gershwin song which sums up all my sentiments.

There's a saying old

Says that love is blind.

Still we're often told

"Seek and ye shall find.

"So I'm going to seek a certain lad I've had in mind.

Looking ev'rywhere,

Haven't found him yet;

He's the big affair I cannot forget -

Only man I ever think of with regret.

I'd like to add his initial to my monogram.

Tell me, where is the shepherd for this lost lamb?

There's a somebody I'm longing to see:

I hope that he

Turns out to be

Someone who'll watch over me.

I'm a little lamb who's lost in the wood;

I know I could

Always be good

To one who'll watch over me.

Although he may not be the man some

Girls think of as handsome,

To my heart he carries the key

Don't you tell him, please, to put on some speed,

Follow my lead? Oh, how I need

Someone to watch over me.

Where are the heroes?

I had a complete wipe-out this morning on my way to walk on a busy business street. I am glad that I wasn't hurt but very disappointed that there was no hero who came to my rescue. Am I no "damsel" and therefore undeserving of some form heroic rescue from a dashing hero? Sigh - is this city completely hopeless or what?

Walk of shame or swagger of pride?

Ms. Smooth Operator sauntered into the office wearing a dress - unusually dressed up for Ms. SO who usually prefer trousers to dress. Ms. SO's boss cheekily teased "Hot date tonight, SO?" Ms SO responded "That was last night".

This situation is typically referred to the walk of shame but here in this men-deprived city, we call it the swagger of pride.

Watch the steps

I finally mustered up enough courage to go to the yuppie gym. I surprised myself - I am fitter than I gave myself credit for. As I glided down the stairs to the women's locker room, I passed a guy who avoided eye contact with me at all cost. A few steps down, I heard a plop and thud. The snooty guy missed his steps while he gave me the brush-off. There you go - I did make a guy fall for me - literally on the steps.

The Wedding Date

My mom called me earlier this evening and asked "Your cousin wants to know if she should send you a plus guest invitation to her wedding or a no-guest invitation".

Crap - the wedding is less than three months away - July 11, 2009 - the exact day of dread. I am happy that my cousin will be marrying her true love on that day; however, I am slightly concern about looking like a loser without a hot date in my arms. The wedding with be the first of my generation on my mom's side. Of course, I dream of having the most handsome, charming, and intelligent guy who can dance to accompany me to this wedding.

So, dear friends - if you know of any handsome, charming, intelligent guy who dances well that is looking to earn good karma points, please please please send him my way. I only need him July 11 & dressed in a nice suit. To repay your kindness, there is one ticket for you to the No Doubt Reunion Tour on July 18 (celebration after day of dread) - great seat.

If all else fails, perhaps I should check out imdb in search of an actor who will play the part of charming date to the wedding. (Hmm....I wonder if Robert Pattinson will still be in town shooting Twilight at that time....)

Give me Ass

My anusara classes are never boring - always entertaining. During this evening class, my lovely instructor called out "Christopher, move your right butt check to BB" (BB is yours truly - in case you have forgotten) "Christopher, don't move your ass to Tom (on your left) - move it to BB (on your right) - give her more ass". I love Anusara - even my instructor is trying to help my cause. Hahaha.

Twilight

The second movie of the Twilight series is currently filming in my city. Giving in to the heavy endorsements of the first movie by friends, I caved and read the first book of the series over the weekend. They were right - vampire can be so hot, sexy and desirable. I melted in a puddle of hopeless romanticism after reading about how heroic Edward was and how much he loves Bella - awwww..... I too wish to have a hero who loves me eternally and rescue this damsel when she is in distressed (instead of having to pick myself up).

p.s. Robert Pattinson - call me.

Silver lining

I am not getting a bonus nor a pay increase this year but at least I scored a free month of pass at the local yuppie gym. I will be ignoring the dark cloud while staring into the silver lining like a little kitty drawn to a shiny object.

The reason I got the pass was to check out the male patrons at the yuppie gym. It was as if the universe is saying "come come come on over". Haha.

Watch out male yuppie gym-ers, don't hurt yourself when I break out the "stretch".

LSC

Love, support, and cookie - according to Steve Harvey, those are the only three things one needs in a relationship (at least from the male perspective).

I must admit I agree with Mr. Harvey more so especially after a long and challenging day at work. I don't need to come home to more nagging and third degree interrogation. All I need after a long day of hard work is love, support and maybe some cookie (if I am awake). So dear men, I hear ya - the next one that comes into my life will be showered with love and support plus cookie (if I think you're deserving and don't annoy me too much).

Bathroom humour

I shall take a brief break from grace to share this with you what I learnt at dinner this evening (yeah - trust me IT is that good).

Men are like toilets. The good ones are taken. The ones that stay with you are the ones who take your shit.

Just another observation

Just another observation - I pass no judgement.

Walking to my yoga class after work today, I walked pass a male who had on lipstick and a floral top. That is not unusual in this single-female-unfriendly city that I live in. What puzzled me was that the male had obvious chin hair - one would logically think to remove chin hair before applying lipstick - no?

Shoes

Girls love shoes - that is a given. Do girls judge guys by the shoes they wear? I do recall conversations about men footwear and how the girls do judge the men by their shoes. Yesterday on my way home, I spotted one guy in Uggs and another in shoes with lifts! My oh my - what would the shoe-girls say about these two fellows?

Standards

Friends and relatives who have found their plus ones often suggest that perhaps the reason that I am without a plus one is due to the fact that my standards are way too high. Too high? I only hope to meet a plus one who shares my values and outlook in life, whom I am attracted to - someone just like me who is male. If they think this is too much to ask for, then they must think either not think much of me or think too highly of me.

Snoogle me happy

Dear Snoogle-maker,

Why oh why do you market your snooglies to the preggers only? I think you have an excellent product which has a wide appeal - thus stop limiting your products only to a specific niche market. The solo sleeper who needs some warmth & snuggly at night but are not blessed with a co-bedder can really use the comfort provided by your product, the snoogle.

Oh yeah, can you make stripes or polka dots cover as well (or at least something prettier)?

Snoogling zzzzzz....

RECESSISON

"RECESSISON" spotted on the t-shirts worn by the bartenders at the Hudson Bar. I thought that was a clever play on word. I must admit I did enjoy my stay at the Hudson and my late evenings spent dancing at the bar. What intrigued me was the kinky shower in the room - the shower visible through the glass window to the bedroom. How fun it could have been? Sigh - my prudeness got the better of me.

Gossip Men

Overheard at the neighbourhood drugstore today, two grown male employees of the store gossiping about a May-December couple in the store.

Male Employee 1: Is that the older sister or the mom?
Male Employee 2: They have the same look.
Male Employee 1: Whatever it is - she is doing him in the bedroom for sure.
Male Employee 2: Well, good for her - err and him too.

I was trying very hard to contain my laughter. Very nice to know that men gossip too.

Ooh Damn

Dear guys,

Listen to Ne-Yo - he's the man. I'm impressed with his suave ways.

http://globalgrind.com/content/464175/A-Window-Into-Suaveness/

XOXO
BB

Age rule: Divide by 2 Plus 7

I was thrilled when yoga teacher extraordinaire, Chris Chavez, gave me permission to knock off eight years from my real age for doing a pose at the yoga workshop. Yippee - I'm under 25 again!

Well, the point of this post is not exactly to toot my own yogic horn but to ponder the question of age - does age really matter in mates? Based on the age rule of divide by two plus seven, my dating age range is between 23 and 50. Funny enough, I had been (sorta) asked out by a 24 year old as well as a 49 year old in the past six months.

Out dancing in the City last Friday, I was in awe of the dancing prowess and physical hotness of my dancing partner of that evening. Lo & behold my dancing partner whom I thought was around my age turned out to be 49! I was floored when he revealed his age to me. Me being me, of course, proceeded to ask "OMG - you don't look your age at all. I thought you are way younger. Did you have any work done?"

The City

I'm off to the City (as in the city of SATC) with two super fun ladies. Totally stoked and absolutely ready to rock it out. Hopefully yours truly will return with many tales of adventures from the City.

Yes, I did pack my stretching pants :P

Guys - these are the places you should go

Hey Single Guys

If you are interested in meeting lots of fun-loving and fit girls, these are the places you should go:

1) Yoga classes - girls are zen-out and totally friendly
2) Capoeira - girls who are open to experiencing different world culture
3) Salsa dance classes - girls with rhythm (& you know what they say about girls who can dance)

That's my tip of the day for guys. Now go and explore!

XOXO
BB

Bachelor

It's been years since I last watched an episode of the tv dating show, the Bachelor. Tonight I caught the last 15 minutes of the show and disappointedly Mr. Bachelor dumped fellow Vancouverite Jillian (the reason I tuned into the show tonight). The reason he gave her was that she has an amazing life of her own? Huh? So, a girl who knows how to have an amazing life without a man is deemed undesirable, Mr. Bachelor? Wow - dude, you totally don't deserve the fine ladies from Vancouver then.

Vancouver is known to have a breed of fine ladies who are fully capable of living fun-filled amazing lives of their own - with or without guys because there is a serious shortage of eligible single men in this city. So dear single eligible men of the world, please come to Vancouver if you want to meet some fine young ladies.

Just not that into you

Boy danced the night away with Girl at the club to the crooning of Barry White. Boy kissed Girl at the end of the night. But Boy didn't give Girl his phone number - therefore it was concluded that Boy was just not that into Girl. Girl ended kiss abruptly and ran away from Boy (so that she didn't miss her ride home) - therefore it was concluded that Girl was just not that into Boy.

There you go - Boy and Girl just wanted to have a little PG fun dancing away that night (nothing more).

V-day

Happy Valentine's Day!

Yours truly has no special romantic interest to shower love on - so, to everyone out there, much love from me to you! (Now pay it forward...maybe it'll makes its way back to me)

XOXO
BB

Seriously did those words just pour out from me? Or was that courtesy of all those different shooters from last night?

Cheat

SG: I don't understand why people here are so critical of those who cheat. People in Asia do it all the time. I don't see anything wrong with it.

BB: Umm....I guess my puritan beliefs are seriously out of date. I don't mean to be judgmental but I just don't think hurtful actions like cheating is of any good or benefit to anyone.

Is my belief that cheating is hurtful really that out-of-date? Am I too naive to still want to have faith in that people will do the right thing?

Is it just a number?

Pre checking out Jesus of Madonna's boytoy fame

The minimum age of the guy one should date is divide your age by two plus seven.

Post checking out Jesus of Madonna's boytoy fame

The minimum age of the guy one should date is of the legal age.

Bendy

During a Friday afternoon chat at work:

BB: There was a new guy at my yoga class yesterday. He was kinda cute.
SO: Did you do the gaze & smile?
BB: No, I'm too shy.
SO: Well, next time cute guy comes to class, pull up your mat next to his and start stretching.
BB: Seriously?
SO: Yes, stretching works every time at my gym - even with the gay men. Let me show you.
SO proceeded to demonstrate this "yoga" move which guarantees success.
BB: I have never done that pose in yoga. It looks more burlesque.
SO: Trust me, this works - try it next time at your gym.

Dear guys - If you see me bust into spontaneous stretching maneuver, don't fret. It's just that I may be a little into you. (Hmm...or maybe you would fret).

Uno

A big flashing neon sign that a guy is a commitment-phobe maybe the fact that he only had one pillow on his bed. True story as experienced by yours truly.
And I thought I have commitment issues...geez.

Dream away

For the past weeks, I have been blessed with dreams of situations with various nice and hot guys. Understandably it was hard to wake myself up from such sweet dreams to drag myself to work. Excitedly thinking that these dreams may be premonition of very good things to come in terms of guys, I consulted the dream dictionary and was disappointed to learn that dreams about guys mean that I am embracing the yang (the masculine side) of me. Sigh!

Viva Las Vegas

Congratulations to my dear friend, Miss Teacher (or now Mrs. Teacher) , who got hitched in Las Vegas last weekend. Mrs and Mr Teacher, both from the same area, met each other in far far away land on a teaching assignment. They fell in love and travelled from places to places teaching young children. Two years after meeting in far far away land, they got married. Wishing them happily ever after.

Way to simulate a daycare

A 33-year-old single mother in California of six children recently gave birth to octoplets, giving her a grand total of fourteen children. Yikes!

Satcitananda

The grass is no greener on the other side of the fence; the grass is of green perfection right where I stand.
Satcitananda - sanskrit for experiencing bliss in your reality (my version of sanskrit translation).

Integrity

Can't we bring integrity back into style? I think (in my humble personal opinion) there is a serious lack of integrity amongst too many guys out there in the dating world. Too many guys are guilty of dating multiple girls at the same time. Yes, I heard of the "Caveman" theory and I do agree with most part of it. However, guys - you are no ape, you are an evolved human. Plus, I have not received the memo about possible human extinction in the very near future - so, you can slow down that "procreation" action that you're so keen on.

Seriously, I thought the days of collecting baseball/hockey cards are just for boys. Now that you're grown, such hobby does not translate into collecting women. Plus, have you not learned from the recent stock market crash about the ramification of greed? Greed may earn you short-term gain but will get you nowhere in the long run.

Last but not least, if you're a man of integrity (and single), I would love to meet you. Perhaps, you can help restore my faith.

p.s. Dear boys, I apologize for the slight bashing. Just needed to rant about those serious offenders.

Tip of the day - remembering dates

SO's new man, Mr. Audi, has a neat trick for making it easy to remember significant dates. He took her out on their first date on new year's day. He recently planted his first kiss on her on one of the most significant day in modern history, Obama's inauguration day. He purposedly timed the kiss on that day - so that he shall never forget a significant event on a significant day. How clever!

Yes, we can!

A shout-out to the true inspiration, Mr. President Obama and of course First Lady Michelle. Everytime I watch the duo on tv, they put a smile on my face. I enjoy the dynamics between them. Mr. President is cool in my books because he often acknowledged the strength and support of his wife - plus I like how she put him in his place too and he chuckled about it.

Congratulations to the ultimate "it" couple! Wishing you the very best.

Love advice

Since the new year, concerned folks have been offering me their advices on finding romance. The list so fars consist of the following:

1) Set the mood/intention
- Read romance novels
- Watch romantic movies
- Wear red especially undergarments [waiting for post V-sale to stock up]
- Wear rose quartz after either washing it under full moon or alternatively placed in freezer overnight
- Wear a red string around the hips (if not wearing red garments or undergarments)
- Replace artwork of single object with artwork featuring couples or beautiful things (in pairs)

2) Go
- To remote mining town in Australia where there is a serious shortage of women
- To Alaska (land of Sarah Palin - yikes!)
- To Las Vegas (to catch a whale?)
- To a particular diner in Abbotsford - where the construction crew hangs out
- To certain local grocery stores at certain time

3) Do
- Join a male-oriented activity group - e.g. running club [I would be literally chasing men then because for the life of me, I can't run fast]
- Participate in a yoga retreat [apparently this is where I will find my true love in the form of a man - not just my true love in the form of yoga]
- Volunteer with political endeavours - go Red!
- Attend professional networking events
- Do sports - manly ones not the girly ones that I usually go for
- Chat to neighbours? [maybe not in my neighbourhood]
- Take a class (not a girly one - of course)

I will attempt the above list (at least the ones that are feasible) and shall report on the results accordingly.

Poop

I must be very strange to find pleasure in poop conversation.

I once had a whole conversation about colonic over a dinner date and the date actually turned out to be one of the better dates that I had been on.

When I was still attending Mr. Asthanga's yoga classes, we would spend time after class having pleasant conversation about cow dung and the poop system. I still have a crush on Mr. Asthanga.

Last night, I had a funny conversation about how the toilet flushes with a Kiwi - whom I don't even know.

Hmm - I guess I am just comfortable talking about poop.

Un-veiling

I have been writing about other people's business for more than a month now and I have not shared any of my own sordid tale (not fair, right?). I am a big fan of realness and rawness in people and I do always keep a defensive veil over mine. So, with this post, I am unveiling my own story.

About two years ago, the guy that I adored (note the past tense) told me one day that we were not compatible (this was after an extended period of hanging out). Of course, I was devastated. I went through the laundry list of "not good enough" in my head - not pretty enough, not smart enough, not successful enough, my hair was not straight enough, etc. Trust me, the list that went through my head over and over again was long. At that time, I even felt as if I was unworthy for the air that I breathed (yes, not only was I neurotic, I was dramatic too but only in the inside). Having lost faith in mankind (due to those three words - we weren't compatible), I started spending lots of time at the yoga studio where hours of yoga practice and inspirational words of many kind teachers helped me celebrate my own divinity as I do today. Sometimes we do have to go through the dark and stormy to get to the happy and sunny place.

[I wish I could say that I have fully healed; I am for most times but the odd times, those insecurities do still creep up.]

Six degree of romance

A few years ago, I met Ninja (a guy on a work holiday visa from Japan) at my capoeira class. He was a cool capoeira friend. Years later, I introduced Ninja (who had since moved back to Japan) to Curly Sue - who at that time was moving to Japan to teach English. I just heard from CS that Ninja has fallen for one of her friends whom she recently introduced to Ninja. Aww - I would like to think I have a part in connecting those romance dots (& the rule of karma will in turn bring love karma to me now).

MODF

I teased Miss MM about her Rainbow Club encounter but I think to be fair, I should talk about my previous title of Queen MODF (MODF = Make-out on the Dance Floor) that I reigned when I was living in Toronto six years ago. (That title had been long long retired).

My friends in TO coined that moniker for me because at that time, we all went out every weekends to clubs and bars. I would get bored, had a few drinks more than I should, and entertained myself by succumbing to random make-out sessions on the dancefloor. I once even picked up a guy and made out with him - simply due to the fact that he was friends with the guy from work that I was crushing on. Nothing more than MODF happened - I was as prudish back then as I still am today.

Ahh...memories of fun times....

[MODF no longer happens here - occasionally resurfaced when out of the country]

Golden years

107 year-old lady in China seeks first husband to care for her in hope of relieving the burden of caring for her from her nieces and nephews. This leads me to wonder how the Human Resources department would react if I request to replace the standard pension clause with the "find a husband" clause in my employment contract for retirement planning.

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/28618163?GT1=43001

Anywhere, anytime

Miss Men Magnet (MM) showed us ladies that there is no shortage of guys to have fun with as long as you gaze, smile, and dance (although I'm pretty sure there are more skills required than that). Miss MM seems to be meeting men everywhere, including at the Rainbow Club - where gentlemen prefer gentlemen. Chatted by a guy at Rainbow Club,

MM: Are you gay?
Guy: No, are you?
MM: No, ok let's go dance (& make out later - the last bit was not verbalised but communicated by the gaze of intent)

Strike a Pose

Last night, KS and I, were at a bar enjoying music by the local band. Spotted was a cute photographer taking pictures of the band, the venue and people (in general). Thinking that the camera was pointed at our direction, KS & I, immediately went into pose mode & posed for the photographer. Later we realized that the photographer wasn't taking a picture of us but of the audience in general - how embarrassing.

Zzzzzzzzzzz

Planning a possible girls trip to New York brought back the memory of this funny story. Five years ago, I went to NYC with two girls and we were on full party mode then. We even took short one hour naps from 11 pm to midnight just before we went out dancing. One night, we went to this super fun club where the music was good, men were plenty & friendly, and dancing was awesome. I never felt that desired (by men) ever in my life (even till today). I quickly figured out the best strategy was to just pick one guy and let him shush the other guys away. I was so tired that night I ended up falling asleep at the club while waiting for my friends who were flirting the night away.

My Five

After thinking long and hard, these are the five men I will bring with me to the deserted island:

1) Chef Govind Armstrong - he can make me his famous grilled cheese sandwiches everyday.
2) Lenny Kravitz - someone to serenade me in the hammock.
3) Anderson Cooper - someone to stimulate my mind with world events.
4) Mr. Asthanga - I need a workout after all the grilled cheese sandwiches.
5) Ricky Gervais - I need a good laugh.

Who are your five?

Extraordinary Party Behaviours

Boy Wonder thoroughly enjoys showing up at parties in nothing but his tightie-whities and proudly parades around in his attire (or lack of). Others may be uncomfortable but his girlfriend (who has a great sense of humour) enjoys every moment of it. It sure doesn't hurt that BW is built like Hercules.

Bizarre Girl, who was angered by the lack of attention paid by her boyfriend, decided to pop in a workout dvd and started during abdominal workout in the middle of a party. How bizarre!

Roles reversal

Overheard - a conversation between two friends, Love Sick Boy (LSB) and Steak Girl (SG - a self-picked moniker).

LSB: I recently met a girl at the gym and I really like her. I think we connect at all levels: physically, emotionally, and intellectually.

SG: Wow - that's great. Do you have a picture of her?

LSB: That's us during Christmas
[LSB showing SG pictures of him and his new girl.]

SG: She's way cuter than what I expected. If you've met a girl who's cute and who's into you too, why so glum?

LSB: Well, I think she may still have a boyfriend back home. Plus, she'll leave eventually after the summer. One of us are going to get hurt - and it sucks to think that I will be the one hurting.

SG: Hmm, too bad. Well, sucks to be you then.

[I laughed so hard at SG's brutal honesty - sometimes you need a friend to just tell you like it is.]

Men Diet

Bombarded by diet and online dating ads post new year, I can't help but share my two cents on the subjects.

Junk Food - Junk Food men are smooth, sexy, and hot. They say the right thing, look the right way, and oh so charming. However, Junk Food men will give you a heart problem and cancer which eventually leads to ill feeling.

Healthy Vegetable/Fruit - Not the most appealing at first, but extremely good for you. May take a while to get used to but in the long run, gives you the best fuel to live life on.

Sinful Dessert - Well, the Dessert Men just go straight to your hips. Need I say more?

Pommes Frites

A friend of mine took his date to a fine dining establishment. Upon looking at the menu, she said "Wow, this must be a real fancy place because they serve apple fries." [referring to pommes frites]

Mr. Goldilocks

Last night in Vancouver, Mr. Goldilocks was dragged by five lovely young ladies to the local pub for drinks, laughs, and not-so-subtle men-gawking. Mr. Goldilocks, who prefers gentlemen to ladies, was chatted up by a few young ladies at the pub. Meanwhile, the five lovely young ladies were left to their own devices - unapproached by men. Sigh....time for a miracle, perhaps?

A case of Austen-ism

'Tis only the second day of a brand new year and I have already decided that I have a serious case of Austenism. Austenism is a disease of the mind which affects judgement of and interaction with male human species. Symptoms include overindulgence in the pleasure of witty banters, swifness in deeming most men as insufferable creatures (& vice versa - most men find me insufferable as well), and a case of hopeless romantic idealism. These are typical traits of the heroine in most of Jane Austen novels, as well as, the alleged life story of the writer herself. The writer, whom died a spinster, gave her heroines the romantic happy endings which she was not blessed with in her life. Will my case of Austenism be one alike that of the character or of the author? Will I have my happy ending or am I destined to give every character his/her happy ending by the power of my pen?

Happy New Year

No snogging last night (sigh). Santa forgot all about my gift (I must have been naughty although I thought I had been very very good).

For the new year, I will resolve the following:

1. Replace my neuroticism with grace (inner & outer)
2. Find bliss in my reality (no more dreamland even though everyone is much much accepting of me in my dreamland).
3. Have faith & surrender (very very testing - faith is wearing too thin)
4. Allow my own divinity to shine shine shine (no matter what)
5. Focus more on commonalities over differences

Happy New Year!